How to thrive as an introvert in workplace and relationships (2)

In the previous post, I walked you through how to thrive in your workplace. Now let's look at how to thrive in relationships. 

In this blog post, I'll like to address relationship not just from the romantic entanglement perspective but also from the angle of friendship. 

 

Friendship is an essential part of human existence. You can say that you blend into a community when you have successfully made friends. This friendship relationship however is an invitation to less personal time and this can be a problem if you don't properly get a handle of it.  

Here are 4 ways to thrive in a friendship relationship as an introvert

1. Be more open about yourself

 

Friendship is about how much you can self disclose. This involves being vulnerable which might be uncomfortable. Help your friends understand you better by sharing more information about yourself and your tendencies. When your friends are aware of who you are, they can make allowances for you just to keep the friendship going. 

2. Find a shared interest

 Friendship thrives on sharing. If there is nothing to share, the relationship fizzles out. To be a better friend, ask your friends what their interests are and look for something you can do together. You can start a book club together, paint, watch movies, watch the stars and so on. You don't have to pick new hobbies but for the sake of friendship, if there is no shared interest then you should suggest something or try something new together. Start small but be intentional. Your friendship will get better when you can make some level of compromise for your friends. 

3. Add value at every given opportunity 

As an introvert, you are known to have a vivid imagination. Your mind is a vast land where anything is possible. A great way to thrive in friendship is to think of ways to add value to them. Open up yourself to profer solution to problems that your friends might have. Write a copy for their business, edit their texts, find ways to use your strength for the benefit of your friends. 

4.Love them how they want to be loved

Everyone has different ways of receiving love. These ways are calling love languages. Someone who likes gifts would most likely not feel loved when you give them quality time. Understand your friends love languages and love them accordingly. To learn more about love languages, visit:  

What are the 5 love languages?

All that was stated above are applicable in a romantic relationship. To enjoy a great relationship, you need to come out of your cocoon more. Be open about yourself, look for ways to add value to your friends or partner, find a shared interest and love them exactly how they want to be loved. With these, you are in friendship bliss. 

For more on this topic, visit:

Friendship tips for introverts

3 signs you're a bad kind of introvert and need to change

 

Let me know what you think in the comments section. 

Click the follow button on the too left corner of this blog page so that you can be notified of more insightful contents. 

 

How to thrive as an introvert in workplace and relationship (1)

As humans, we are made to interact with one another irrespective of our personality traits. One huge mistake anyone can make is to allow their personality deprive them of the benefits of meaningful human interaction. As an introvert, I understand that it comes easy to us to stay away from society. However, it is very important that we do not become victims of what should be a part of us. Like I wrote in the first article of this series, The Real Deal about Introverts, your personality is for you not the other way round. This article is dedicated to helping introverts thrive in both their work environment and in relationships. 

The workplace is one environment every responsible adult cannot be away from. Now, I know that people are working remotely these days and it's become more prevalent since the break out of the covid pandemic, however, you cannot deny the fact that you will work with a person or a team of people at some point at work.By the way, in my opinion, working remotely is not the best choice for introverts. It allows you to wallow in your tendencies and that is not making you a better person. A friend once posted that they have become more impatient with people because of that less amount of time spent among other people. This is proof that you cannot gain mastery over your personality especially as an introvert if you don't find ways to interact with people. Two very important ways are the workplace and relationships.  

Let's take a look at the workplace. 

Imagine you are required to work with a team every day for 2 months to plan and execute a project, you are required to meet from 9am to 5pm to get the job done and then your introvert tendencies start to kick in. You get tired to hearing them talk, you get  tired of the conversation, you need time to think and a quiet environment to just be by yourself for a while. I'm sure these sound familiar. 

Here are ways to thrive in this environment and still be true to yourself

1. Schedule breaks 

Take a break. It's that simple. You need a break? Take one. As an introvert, you need time to recharge after a while of interaction. You are at your best when you take this little breaks so you shouldn't deprive yourself of what you need to be working at optimal. Take lunch alone, take walks if possible, just make sure you are getting your slice of quiet everyday. 

2. Utilize your intuition

Introverts are known to be very intuitive. You are perceived to be better thinkers so bring this to your team to make things work. When you take your breaks, ruminate on what has been discussed. It comes easy to you to see all sides of opinions because of how your mind works, explore this so that your team can see how valuable you are. When your team understand that your thinking time brings constructive contributions to the work, they will respect your alone time and might even schedule some time for you. 

3.  Prepare before you speak

When you are asked to lead a presentation, make sure that you take time to prepare. Your natural inclination is not to address a crowd so you must be mentally prepared to do so. Think about what you want to say, pen down an outline than familiarize yourself with it. Do not for any reason try to go into addressing an audience without preparing. It does you a whole lot of good to know that you are ready to face the crowd. 

4.  Smile more to emit a warm aura

Smiling makes you more approachable. As an introvert, you are usually accused of been aloof or disconnected from the environment, this is why smiling is essential for you. Smiling makes people more comfortable around you. It makes you look confident and in control. It also makes you feel good about yourself. You should try smiling more when you are working with your team. You'll thank me later. 

5. Acknowledge and accept accolades for your achievements

You are a valuable member of your team and you should accept that. Acknowledge your achievements so that you can be motivated to do more. When you do great at a task, take the praise. It encourages you to try it again especially when it's your first time. I understand that you might want to shy away from attention but this is good for you. You are taking control of your life when you can bypass your tendencies to be a better version of yourself. 

6. Utilize your ability to write

Introverts are generally known to prefer writing in the place of speaking. To be an asset to your team, volunteer to handle every form of writing - reports, emails, memos, letters - all that needs to be documented. Writing is a great and more comfortable way of expression for introverts.

To learn more about this, read How to succeed and thrive as an introvert at work

Conclusion

You can make great achievements in your workplace even as an introvert. Don't overlook your tendencies, take control of them. Smile more often, be proud of your achievements, prepare before you address an audience and use that writing skill to give your team an edge. 

The real deal about introverts

The Real Deal about Introverts

 The term introvert is a very common word used when people talk about personalities. It is often used to refer to quiet, shy, reserved or antisocial people. This personality trait is very underestimated and seen as a disadvantage. People generally think something is wrong with a person who is introverted. 

I am an introvert and I can safely say that I have survived the world because I have people in my life who understand my personality trait and love me for it. If you are an introvert or you have someone who is one and you think something is wrong with them, then, this post is for you. Together, we are going to be looking at the real deal about introverts. 

Introverts can be broadly described as people whose natural inclination is to enjoy personal pace and solitude. These people pass off to be uninterested and passive but what's actually up is that they need breaks from social scenes to maintain sanity. We introverts love you but we like to go inward at intervals so we can recharge our social batteries and in turn keep up with your energy or at least be close enough to keep up. In a nutshell, introverts like socializing in small doses. 

Going inward is advantageous to any social group introverts find themselves because they tend to rationalize and think through stuffs that are being discussed so that they can bring an objective stand point to the table. So you see, they are a gift to you. 

Dear introvert, you are a gift. Know that and own it. 

Now, let's go deeper into some of the things introverts are seen as and take them down:

They are seen as shy

This is not true. Why? because being an introvert is not the cause for shyness. Shyness is a trait that can be found in anyone, introverted or otherwise. Being shy is being uncomfortable with attention of any sort. It is a feeling that comes from consciousness of inadequacy that causes you to back out of anything that would put you out there. What you see as Shyness in an introvert is actually a deliberate choice to be away from the public eye and this stems from the preference of solitude and personal space. That an introvert chooses to stay unseen doesn't mean they cannot handle attention. We just choose not to. 

They are seen as passive

This is another false perception. They don't wear their hearts on their sleeves. An introvert chooses when to reveal emotions so we might be seen as passive because of this choice. Because of their secretive nature, introverts tend to mask their emotions to prevent scrutiny. Introverts can be quite vulnerable when they are in the company of people they have been able to connect with. 

They are perceived to be unfriendly

This perception is stemmed from the limited number of people that an introvert is associated with. Because they don't socialize much and invariably have few people in their lives, introverts are seen as unfriendly or not interested in making friends. I'm an introvert and I can stand for us to say that we want friends. Maybe even more than extroverts. The only clause is that we crave genuine connection so it takes us a while to warm up to someone but when we do, we tend to be the most loyal in the bunch. So get yourself an introvert friend because like wolves, we stick for life. 

They are thought to be indecisive

I know what you are thinking and I understand where you are coming from but I'll explain why introverts seem indecisive. When a decision has to be made, the mind of an introvert goes blank for a second. This is their brain telling them to take a breather. Their brain cannot rush things so it blanks out then reboots so that constructive thinking can commence. You have to be honest though, when they finally decided, they have a very detailed reason why they made that choice. That's because they thought it through. 

 They may be seen as unfit for leadership

Introverts are actually one of the best leaders in the world. This is because they are intuitive, patient and thoughtful. They weight the pros and cons before they made decisions which makes them the best choice for leadership. If you have an introvert friend or family who seems unfit to lead, it is because they haven't developed that part of their lives yet or they don't see themselves as leaders. When they can open themselves up to that area of their lives, they are your best bet for effective leadership. A

A lot of things introverts don't do are personal choice to not do them. They need reasons to decide otherwise. In a personal growth journey of an introvert, a great source of motivation is to find the value of what they need to do. Once they find that reason, they are unstoppable.  

Now that we have debunked the wrong perceptions about introverts, let's make a list of what they actually are:

They are "social snails"

As opposed to extroverts who are social butterflies, I think introverts are social snails because they take the world in small doses at a time. 

They enjoy solo projects but can be great team players

 Because of their deep thinking, they are great resource for team work since they are known to be more constructive and objective. 

They desire deeper connection

This desire results in them not knowing how to make small talks. Introverts tend to thrive more in intellectual conversations because they are "mind" people and are naturally attracted to brilliant minds. 

They enjoy their alone time

Introverts thrive on their personal time out. They need it regularly so that they can be balanced. It's a time to recharge or think and this makes them more inclined to the creative arts like music, fine arts, writing etc. However, not every introvert can write songs or paint or write, they can always connect to various forms of creativity because they understand where they come from. 

 

They tend towards overthinking

Introverts are "mind" people which makes them very imaginative.  They have a whole world in their minds that they can retract into consciously or unconsciously. Because of this tendency, they tend to overthink. They can ruminate on issues over and over again and this causes them to see a lot of negatives and in turn leads to them not going for or agreeing with the matter being discussed. 

If you are an introvert and you are reading this post, I want you to know that you are absolutely normal. You are not a freak and neither are you less than the rest of the world. Your personality is unique and should well appreciated. What you need to take note of however,  is that your tendencies can be your biggest limitations. You can be your own barrier to impacting the world so what you need to do is to choice growth and never ending improvement. Your personality is for you not the other way round so it's your responsibility to feed your strengths by constant practice and starve your weakness by replacing them with more productive choices. Your reason for growth is because you are a light the world is waiting for. Choice to grow and shine. 

Popular Introverts who are successful include:

• Mark Zuckerberg

• Bill Gates

• Former President Barack Obama

• Warren Buffett

So you see, all you need is to decide to grow. 

Conclusion

There is no absolute introvert neither is there an absolute extrovert. Everyone has a bit everything. The features that are predominant defines your personality trait. One important thing to note is to make sure you are improving yourself so that your tendencies don't limit you from experience the world as you should. 

Related articles:

Who is an introvert?

Signs of an introvert personality